Progress....or lack of!

Well it's just been one slippery slope, probably since about January.  I lost my mojo a bit,  stopped going to class as the New Year resolution gang joined enmasse and class took forever...I mean forever!! Things cropped up socially and with the kids that stopped me going every other week. I started having a bit of this and a bit of that. I then started having more of this and lots more of that. I gained a little. I went on holiday to Tenerife a wee bit heavier than I was but still felt acceptable.  Which brings me to round about April time. I work in a school and April to July is the busiest term ever. It was s#?t! I was stressed. Mega stressed. I'm not sure if I was consciously over eating on junk but I know that stress causes weight gain due to a hormone it triggers. The rest is just a downward spiral from that moment on.

I have tried several times to get myself back into slimming world. I know how it works. I know the plan. I have the books...I start off my day well but by evening it's all been sabotaged by eating crisps, a biscuit, sometimes chocolate, maybe a sandwich thrown in there and possibly more crisps!!!

Why oh why?! I hate the weight I am. I hate how I look and yet it doesn't seem to be enough. It's got to come from within and I just don't know or understand why I am doing it to myself because I end up every night feeling grumpy and frustrated with myself for not sticking to it, vowing that tomorrow I'll be better...and the wheel just seems to go round and round!!

I buy jeans that fit...and then another size smaller for when I can fit into them. I have heaps of smaller clothes with labels still on them! Even that doesn't seem to be incentive enough. It's the wrong kind of pounds I'm losing!

So browsing through my kindle and I find this book. A comedy about a couple trying to lose a bumper amount of weight in a competition to try and win the big cash prize of £50,000 and all the ups and downs of trying to lose weight.

I'm hoping that I can relate to the problems they encounter...and hopefully get some motivation back!!

Failing that....I think it's wired jaws and a zip!!

Gain

Oh dear!  I've been slipping for quite a while now and it's been a bit like one step forward and 10 steps back.  My heart hasn't really been in it.  I had missed class for various reasons, mainly due to being away for a few weekends and as my class is on a saturday, with working fulltime, sometimes a saturday can be busy with appts etc.  So today I stood on my own scales and saw that I was probably going to be about 3 or 4lbs heavier than the last time I went.  I know the diet, I know what to do, what to eat etc so thought to myself that as my heart wasn't in it, I would probably be better giving the class up and just plodding along doing it myself and saving myself the £5 each week.  Although I did feel quite guilty about giving up.  However, a quick chat with my pal Karen who also goes to Slimming World, changed my mind and I was back to class before I knew it and feeling motivated again to carry on.  Sometimes when you slip it's quite hard to get back into it, and I find that when hubby is home it just all goes right out the window!  However - I'M BACK and am raring to give it another go!!  I only have 4.5lbs to take me into the next stone bracket - so if I could manage that before I go on holiday I'll be quite happy!  As I've said before, I'm def taking the scenic route and my journey is such a slow one - but I'll just keep chipping away at it and hopefully one day will be a size and shape that I'm much happier with and a lot more confident about.  Onwards and upwards!!

Flexi Time

In an attempt to move myself I've treated myself to a Fitbit Flex. I've seen lots of posts about it on instagram from sw people I follow, so thought I would give it a go. So far so good and it has certainly made me go out and take the dogs a longer walk than I could really be bothered doing!  Hope I can keep motivated with it. It's amazing how many steps you do doing just normal day to day things! Maybe get my stone off in time for Tenerife after all!

Chins

Just as it says - oh to just have one chin!!!  If only I could just lop it off - along with half of my body!!

Me

No weigh-in for me this week as I was away getting this done!  The blonde is gone!! I'm sure I must be lighter though with all that heavy hair chopped off!  

Trying to take my mind off food!

This is to try and stop me grazing! Night time is my downfall.  During the day I can be so good and have tremendous willpower and really stick to the diet, but come evening I can ruin it all in one fell swoop!!  I've been going out walking a lot with the dogs...but as soon as my bum is on that couch with the laptop in front of me I'm on the look out for food!  Normally crisps or a bit of chocolate!  Which is ok if I have syns to use but it puts me on the slippery slope as I maybe wouldn't stop at the one!

So everytime I'm feeling the urge I'm going to try and do a bit of crochet until it passes.  I'm no expert at it whatsoever but it occupies my hands and my mind!!

It's all about damage limitation! 

Anyone need a scarf?? lol

Getting Inspiration

Sat out in the sun this afternoon reading the new Slimming World magazine.  I love reading all the success stories and love seeing the before and after pictures, which made me think about my own 'before' pictures.  I have quite a few tucked away which I have been so disgusted with when I've looked at them, but instead of deleting them I've always thought about keeping them in the hope that one day I too can have a set of before and after pics to proudly show off.

I loved reading this lady's story.  There is a bit in it when she talks about going into the changing room and trying on a size 12 for the first time and it fitted her so comfortably.  She was just over the moon and almost overcome with emotion.  I love that.  I would love that to be me.  I can't remember the last time I wore anything size 12 - hopefully one day..........

Introduction

This is my attempt at creating a lifeline for myself and letting me lose the weight I so desperately want and need to lose!

I have joined Slimming World half heartedly on several occasions - I've tried juicing, shakes, fasting, atkins, very low carb, cambridge - you name it I have probably tried it!

Out of them all the only success I've had was 3 years ago when I was turning 40 and I was determined to change my life for the better - so I signed up for The Moonwalk (26 miles walking marathon which starts at midnight and you walk all through the night - which makes it very hard) and at the same time I joined Slimming World.  From the January to the June when the walk took place I lost 2.5 stones and felt fantastic.  I still had more to go but I felt great and really fit with all the walking.  So a combination of following an eating plan and walking definitely did the trick and doing them both was certainly the key to my success.  I'm not going to call it a diet as it certainly never felt like a diet as I was able to enjoy all my favourite foods - potatoes, rice and pasta - all the things you aren't allowed or allowed only little amounts of on other diets. That used to throw me that I could eat all the heavy carbs and still lose weight yet other diets it was a big no no.

My husband is a very active man and swears that healthy eating and exercise is the only way - it might take longer than all the fad diets and it might be a struggle at first, but the more you do the lighter you get the fitter you get, the fitter you get the faster you get, the faster you get the more you burn - so it's just a cycle that gets easier.

Sadly after I did my Moonwalk - the walking stopped - and so did the diet and by the end of the year my weight had creeped up yet again.  So I signed up to do the Moonwalk again and did so for the next 2 years but the walking alone just didn't do it - I barely lost any weight.  I was a lot fitter which was good, but I certainly wasn't losing.

So here I am again - and I am determined.  We all know what we need to do to lose weight but unless you are in the right frame of mind, it just doesn't work.  There is a switch inside all of us when we just get to that point where enough is enough and it just makes you WANT to do it.  I NEED to do it - I worry for my health.  I hate how I look and feel.  I am bloated constantly and my belly just juts out bigger than my boobs!  I am only 5ft 2 which makes me look even worse.  I really need to do this for myself - so this is it!!

I'm not going to tell you what my starting weight is as that's all too shameful but I have given myself a goal of losing 4.5 stones - a lot of weight to lose but I have a weight in mind that I want to get down to.

I joined Slimming World 3 weeks ago on the 9th July 2014 and after the first week I lost 4lbs (yay) - then was away on holiday and had a lot of family coming to stay....and you know how it is....I ended up putting on 2.5 lbs back on!!  So enough is enough, my husband has gone away offshore and the visitors are over - so here it goes!!

I will try and post my progress each week!  Wish me luck!! :)